Montreal artists present new Urban Plan for Lower Main

July 8th, 2010

Eyebrows are once again being raised concerning the competence of urban planning on the Lower Main. First came the wholesale evictions and gutting of the now-crumbling historic block on the west side of the Lower Main, effectively transforming an area where entertainment once thrived into a dangerous and boarded-up eyesore.  Now, on the south-east corner of Ste. Catherine Street and St. Laurent, all construction work has stopped on the 2-22, an intended cultural center, where, astoundingly, the ground was only broken a few weeks ago.

What was meant to be an anchor in the Quartier des Spectacles is now yet another example of failure to resuscitate the moribund historic area. While the Angus Development Corporation is clearly trying to maximize profits, their proposals are seriously lacking in artistic and cultural vision. Only recently, despite serious opposition from the public, the Angus Development Corporation attempted to destroy authentic Montreal burlesque culture within the historic Café Cleopatra in order to build an office tower.

With all of the delays, destruction and sloppy planning, artists from the Save The Main Coalition have created an alternative Urban Plan for the Lower Main. Taking into account the unique heritage of the area, the new plan highlights its role as an Historic Site devoted to the days of Prohibition – and proposes its restoration as a major destination for entertainment in the heart of the new Quartier des Spectacles. The plan also calls for the revival of burlesque, Montreal’s traditional form of spectacle, to fuel the artistic revival that is necessary to reclaim this important cultural space.

The problem was recently identified during a CKUT radio interview with Craig Sauvé.

The artists from the Save The Main Coalition followed-up with a formal presentation to City officials at the PECHAKUCHA NIGHT MONTREAL #17 – 7 MAI 2010, ÉDITION SPÉCIALE : BOULEVARD SAINT-LAURENT. The video is entitled  “Why Montreal Should Incorporate its Burlesque Heritage into its Brand Image”.

The artists are now requesting a meeting with Montreal’s head of Urban Planning, Richard Bergeron. They hope to present their own antidote for the current mess on the Lower Main: a visionary artistic approach that will enhance heritage, culture, and tourism by properly employing Montreal’s historic assets, effectively reviving burlesque entertainment right in the heart of the Quartier des Spectacles.

Artists still waiting for box office cash – 10 years after being kicked out of the Fringe!

June 20th, 2010

This month marks the 10th anniversary of OTL’s infamous CAR STORIES show getting ejected from the St-Ambroise Montreal Fringe Festival, and already the media are taking note of this disturbing milestone. The story is one of the most recounted in Montreal’s anglophone theatre community – it is the story of unethical corporate interests steamrolling artists at what used to be their own event, the Fringe. It is a well-documented story about corporations trying to exploit artists – and those artists fighting back using a strategy of cultural resistance and infringement.

To mark the 10th anniversary of CAR STORIES’ ejection from the so-called “Fringe” festival, the OTL has decided to try and collect the ticket sales it was defrauded of over 10 years ago. It appears as though Jeremy Hechtman, the man responsible for transforming the Fringe from a grassroots community event into a corporate feeding trough, is finally stepping down this year. Filling those capitalist shoes is Amy Blackmore, a long-time Fringe afficianado and talented artist. The question on the minds of many artists in the community is whether she intends to continue with the corporate program that has essentially destroyed what was once one of the city’s most poular grassroots festivals, or if she has enough courage and vision to restore the festival to a semblance of its former self. OTL decided to ask her, and sent the following letter:

———–

Dear Ms. Blackmore,

Congratulations once again on taking over responsibility for the Montreal Fringe Festival from Jeremy Hechtman. As the only artists ever kicked out of any Fringe Festival (by Hechtman in 2001), we feel that we are in a unique position to offer constructive criticism directed at improving the Fringe Festival, and indeed encouraging it to return to its original grassroots approach. We are keeping a close eye on developments, and are extremely hopeful that you will do a better job respecting the rights of artists and the local theatre community for the duration of your mandate.

Unfortunately, your new post does not come without baggage. As you may recall, 10 years ago our show (Car Stories)  was ejected from the Fringe festival, according to Jeremy Hechtman because we offended then-sponsor The Gazette by writing a satirical critique of their theatre critic Pat Donnelly, who cancelled all Fringe festival reportage until we were given the boot. Hechtman also stated that The Gazette had threatened to withdraw $15,000 in sponsorship money, making it very clear that The Gazette was in a conflict-of-interest as both corporate sponsor and media responsible for covering the event. It became very clear in 2001 that the artists at the Fringe now played second fiddle to corporate sponsors, effectively negating the concept of the original festival (which was activist in nature).

Furthermore, Jeremy Hechtman refused to pay us the ticket sales Car Stories earned for the week run before it was ejected ($822.00) or the projected sales from the sold-out run (around $1000), nor did he reimburse our “application fee” of $253.06 which was required simply to appear in the Fringe schedule (we brought our own venue). Ten years later, with accrued interest, we figure the Fringe Festival you are inheriting still owes the artists it defrauded in 2001 close to $5000.00. We have the documentation to prove our claim, which we can put online if you like to ensure there is no confusion as to what actually happened.

I am asking you firstly, as the new Fringe Festival director, to reimburse us fully for the amount owed. Secondly, I know our artists are still waiting for an apology regarding their shabby treatment at the hands of the Fringe in 2001. Lastly, if you meet these conditions, we at the infringement festival would be happy to consider forming a new relationship with the Fringe, this time based on mutual respect and potential collaboration for dealing responsibly with artistic issues in the community.

Please understand that for authentic fringe artists like us, 10 years is a long time to wait for what is owed. As such, if I do not hear back from you by June 18, I will have no choice but to send theatrical “Collection Agents” to the Fringe festival to try and collect our ticket sales money. On June 19, 10 years ago, Jeremy Hechtman told us we were being kicked out of the Fringe. It is a day artists will never forget, and, failing the immediate reimbursement of our money, it is the day we plan to raise a theatrical ruckus at the Fringe beer tent to remind everyone about the corruption still affecting the current Fringe.

I truly hope you will do the right thing and get in touch immediately to work out a payment plan, or at least to try and explain your own position. We are flexible, and can avert the (very public) theatrical protests/media campaign if you demonstrate a serious commitment to resolving this issue in a timely manner. I can be reached at 514-842-1467 or via email. I hope to hear from you soon!

Sincerely,

Donovan King

——-

It should be noted that Ms. Blackmore did respond promptly and in a  courteous manner, but she did not deal with any of the issues or arrange a plan to rectify the situation. Speculation is rife that as the “co-producer” with Hechtman (for this year only), she does not actually wield any poltical clout (yet).

The OTL has responded, as promised, with a theatrical campaign to collect the ticket sales and spur social justice.

COLLECTION AGENCY is a piece of Do-It-Yourself theatre whereby those wishing to participate create and assume a theatrical “Collection Agent” character, and proceed to investigate 3 dramatic people or companies to collect what is owed. Using primary documents within a theatrical matrix that includes both the Fringe and the infringement festival, the first participant to collect from all three people or companies wins a $500.00 prize (or 10% commission on what the fringe owes OTL). To participate, find someone at the Fringe beer tent distributing the instructions and documentation, or download them. The Documents:

Collection Agency P2 (Collection #1)

Collection Agency P3 (Collection #2)

Collection Agency P4 (Collection #3)

Collection Agency P5 (Media article about Car Stories, 2001)

Collection Agency P6 (the letter that got OTL kicked out of the Fringe)

Collection Agency P7 (letter from Levack, resigning from OTL and begging media to restore coverage. Note it is CCed to Jeremy Hechtman)

Collection Agency P8 (media article from The Gazette about show’s expulsion)

Collection Agency P9 (letter to Fringe from Car Stories artists for box office sales and compensation)

Collection Agency P10 (letter from Hechtman refusing, note he claims he received “no documentation whatsoever” about Levack’s resignation from OTL – he was CCed the resignation in document #7.

Collection Agency P11 (media report from Ottawa Citizen about the scandal)

The first “Collection Agent” to collect all three should email optatif@gmail.com to verify and collect the $500.00 prize!

With a bit of theatrical pressure it is entirely possible Ms. Blackmore will do the right thing and ensure the artists get their ticket sales from the Fringe festival – 10 years late is better than never!

AFTERWORD

OTL visited the Beer Tent the evening of June 20 to ask Ms. Blackmore in person if she had any intention of reimbusring the artists who had been defrauded by the Fringe festival. Ms. Blackmore offered “no comment” and referred us to someone named Mr. Agombar, who is apparently the Fringe’s PR hack (yes, the Fringe Festival actually has paid people on staff for things like damage control!) Mr. Agombar was adamant that they were not to be refunded and even referred to the infringement movement as “10 years of bullshit”.

Fringe Festival spokesmen Brand (left) & Agombar (right)

Not to be outdone, Fringe Festival Board of Directors member Mr. Brand, himself directly implicated in the scandal in 2001, also dismissed the idea that artists should be paid their ticket sales.

And thus the St. Ambroise Montreal Fringe Festival has squandered a rare opportunity to make amends.

Dumpster Dive Art Drive is seeking artists for infringement festival!

May 29th, 2010

UPDATE (June 22)

After a successful opening vernissge, the Dumpster Dive Art Drive has been on display in an undisclosed alleyway for the public to enjoy. One jogger who stumbled upon the opening said, “Thanks! You just made my day!” between chugs of red wine served to him in a brown paper bag.

The great news is that there will be a second vernissage to close the festival! We want to do another one, bigger this time.

The public is invited to BAR BIFTECK (3702 St. Laurent) at 3 pm on Sunday June 27, where they will be led to the secret alleyway art display. Please attend, and please invite others, especially art critics!

Artists should arrive at 2 pm to set up. For artists wishing to created new dumpstered works, please start doing so immediately. Please make about 3 – 5 new, original pieces (or more) from the dumpster or trash, noting the following details:

TITLE
ARTIST
MATERIALS
DESCRIPTION
COST

We have the (waterproof-ish) art labels to fill in! If everyone makes 3 – 5 pieces, we will have a lovely vernissage! Please spread the word to other artists!! Anyone with questions should contact Donovan King at optatif@gmail.com or call 514-842-1467. Cheers!

Pee Brick

—-

The Dumpster Dive Art Drive is an experimental/environmental visual arts project created for the 7th annual Montreal infringement festival.

Artists, both established and beginner, are invited to create artistic works made primarily from dumpstered and recycled materials. The objective of the project is to reclaim items destined for landfill and to transform them into artworks of all types.

The vernissage, where these works will be displayed, is to be held in an alleyway. Artists may opt to sell their works, and can keep 100% of all sales or donate it to an environmental organization of choice. The alleyway vernissage is planned on June 19th at 5pm, and wine will be served to guests and critics from a brown paper bag. The location will be disclosed at a later date.

We encourage anyone who wants to reclaim trash as art and alleyways as galleries to get involved and participate! Create your own art-work for display, or volunteer to help!

To get involved, please call Alexandra Cuellar at 514-683-2750 or email Donovan King at optatif@gmail.com

Is Prince Charles too sexy for YouTube?

May 9th, 2010

Is this man too sexy for YouTube?

A few months ago, the OTL in solidarity with the coalition of artists trying to prevent the destruction of artistic venues on the lower Main produced a video appeal to Prince Charles.  Burlesque dancers asked the Prince, a noted heritage buff, if he would do something to stop Café Cleopatre from being replaced by an office tower.

While this video did generate quite a bit of coverage in places as varied as Paris Match and the Montreal Gazette along with tens of thousands of views, last week, unfortunately, it was removed by YouTube for containing sexually inappropriate content.  Is this video really too sexy for YouTube?  Is it really inappropriate?  Or maybe, is there some other reason why it was removed?  You be the judge:

Envisioning a better plan for the Lower Main

April 15th, 2010

Montreal’s Lower Main has been the site of controversy as of late, with powerful business interests squaring off against artists and heritage activists to determine the future of the historic stretch of road that was once the heart of Montreal’s bustling Red Light District. The battle has been characterized by powerful business interests dislocating the area’s businesses and culture, with artistic protests falling on deaf ears at City Hall. Ironically, it wasn’t long ago that the City was actively studying and considering ways to enhance the area by highlighting its heritage.

For a while it looked as though the business interests were going to win and accomplish their goal of destroying the historic site, including the living culture within it, to put up a soul-less office tower. In collaboration with the City of Montreal, developer Christian Yaccarini and his Angus Development Corporation have been systematically evicting tenants on the historic block through buy-outs and threats of appropriation, resulting in a dangerous eyesore being situated in the heart of the new Quartier des Spectacles.

Historic Site cum dangerous eyesore

Café Celeopatra, the last hold-out on the block, refuses to go without a fight. As a result of both economic woes and legal action brought on by Café Celeopatra to prevent the appropriation, the entire project has been shelved until the legal issues can be resolved.

Crumbling Historic site

This stroke of good fortune has given artists and heritage activists more time to envision and propose superior alternatives to the current arrangement: an ill-conceived business plan that is both autocratic and soul-less, resulting in the destruction of living culture and a historic site. The plan also appears to be at odds with the formal objectives of the Quartier des Spectacles, which aim, among other measures to support culture, to “Develop vacant spaces that meet the needs of festival-goers and activities featured at entertainment venues.”

With the business plan delayed due to Café Cleo’s legal challenge and ongoing cultural protests, it looks as though the City of Montreal is now ready to listen to the artists and heritage activists. In early April, PechaKucha Montréal, in collaboration with the borough of Ville-Marie, put out a contest to envision the future of the Lower Main – from Sherbrooke Street to René-Levesque Boulevard.

Frustrated with the sloppy planning and top-down approach, and given the potential to highlight the area’s fascinating burlesque heritage, we at Optative Theatrical Laboratories decided to submit our own proposal, including 3 JPEG images:

Why Montreal should incorporate its burlesque heritage it into its brand image

 By Donovan King, heritage activist

 The Lower Main was once Montreal’s favourite destination for entertainment. Montreal became famous for its elaborate burlesque shows, as thrill-seekers flocked to the Red Light district during the days of Prohibition. Today, only Café Cleopatra maintains the area’s famous burlesque tradition.

Tourists in Prague soon learn that the city has many “Black Light Theatre” shows on offer. These illusory performances are part of Prague’s tourist experience – and brand image. Montreal should strive to resurrect burlesque as its traditional form of spectacle, and restore the Lower Main to its former glory as a major destination for entertainment.

Since “The Main” is already classified as a historic site, the stretch in question should commemorate the Red Light District and Prohibition. It should be the centrepiece of the new Quartier des Spectacles, offering visitors an authentic experience reflecting Montreal’s Prohibition history. The stretch should be as bustling as Broadway, and the look should be as architecturally close to Prohibition days as possible, with bronze plaques commemorating famous venues, stories, and people.

To facilitate this desired outcome, old buildings must be restored as performance venues, restaurants, clubs, and artist residences. To ensure a steady flow of visitors, famed artists such as the Cirque du Soleil and Robert Lepage should be commissioned to create unique burlesque shows for the restored venues, while Parks Canada should open an historical interpretation centre. A burlesque school should also be founded. By reclaiming its burlesque heritage, Montreal’s brand image is enhanced, encouraging vibrant culture, and attracting more tourists.

————

I am pleased to announce that our proposal has been accepted, and we are scheduled present our vision to city officials and other authorities on Friday May 7. Our task now is to create 20 images that encapsulate our vision in the following format:

  • 1024 x 768px JPEGs, name your pictures with your initials followed by successive numbers, for instance : BD-001.jpg (numbered in their order of presentation)
  • QuickTime movie of slideshow. 640 x 480 (or higher)

We are now urgently seeking visual artists who want to submit images for this presentation. We are going to need 20 realistic-looking JPEGs of images reflecting the proposal. For example, the list might look something like this:

 

IMAGE #1:    Parks Canada Sign  

IMAGE #2:    Aerial Map of Quartier des Spectacles

* add words “Quartier des Spectacles”

IMAGE #3:    Historical photo

IMAGE #4:    Burlesque performance

IMAGE #5:    Café Cleopatra with nightlife

IMAGE #6:    Image of current plan with a red X through it

IMAGE #7:    New Plan needed

IMAGE #8:    Black Light Theatre in Prague

IMAGE #9:    Montreal should reclaim its burlesque heritage

 

IMAGE #10:  How the area used to look

 

IMAGE #11:  Street revamped

IMAGE #12:  Statue of Lili St. Cyr being watched by cop & priest on NE corner of Ste. Catherine & St. Laurent

IMAGE #13:  Bronze marker quoting Lili St. Cyr

“À Montréal j’étais la femme fatale que j’avais toujours rêvé d’être. Quand je déambulais rue Sainte-Catherine pour me render au théâtre, des attroupements se formaient sur mon passage. Les hommes cessaient toute activité pour me regarder passer.” – Lili St. Cyr

IMAGE #14:  Parks Canada Interpretations Centre

 

IMAGE #15:  Marquee with burlesque show by Cirque du Soleil

 

IMAGE #16:  Burlesque School

 

IMAGE #17:  Spectacular Burlesque pic

IMAGE #18:  Happy Tourists

IMAGE #19:  Brand image pic

IMAGE #20:  Formal credits for all artists involved          

              

Thank you so much to all the artists who helped realise this project! Everyone is invited to the presentation on Friday, May 7, at the SAT:

PECHAKUCHA NIGHT MONTREAL #17 – 7 MAI 2010
ÉDITION SPÉCIALE : BOULEVARD SAINT-LAURENT [english follow]
En collaboration avec l’arrondissement de Ville-Marie
Vendredi 7 mai 2010
Ouverture des portes @ 19:20
Début des présentations @ 20:20
Société des arts technologiques [SAT]
1195 Saint-Laurent
GRATUIT !

A new plan is needed

February 15th, 2010

Following the release of the newest video designed to help save the lower Main from destruction at the hands of a developer, the developer in question, Angus, has said it needs more time to complete its project.

They are also now talking about a smaller building, closer to the Monument Nationale in size, instead of the 12-storey behemoth Quadrilaterre they had planned. This is largely due to the efforts of the Save the Main Coalition and the court case brought on by Cafe Cleopatre owner John Zoumboulakis.

While this buys the artists trying to save the Cleo and other historic building some time (the wrecking ball was supposed to fall in March), the fight isn’t over yet. Some have suggested that a new, alternate plan is needed.

Donovan King of OTL explained this on CKUT radio before the latest announcement from Angus:

[mp3player width=350 height=20 config=fmp_jw_widget_config.xml file=https://optative.net/ckutkingmain.mp3]

Destroy the Main in one easy step?

February 11th, 2010

Following the viral success of Lapdance for Prince Charles, the artists hoping to save Cafe Cleopatre and the lower Main from destruction have released another video, this time in both French and English.

Rather than an appeal, it’s a parody infomercial for a new product called Demolition in a Box, that can “destroy any landmark, city, part of town” in one easy and incredibly corrupt step.

The French version is available here and the English version is below:

Burlesque dancers ask Prince Charles to Save the Red Light District

November 10th, 2009

charlesredlightad

The following is a video plea and open letter to Prince Charles on the occasion of his visit to Montreal.  After having exhausted all other means of stopping the destruction of their performance space in the heart of Montreal’s historic Red Light district, burlesque dance troupe the Dead Dolls have turned to the Prince, a man who cares about heritage, with a simple request:  Save the Red Light District and Save the Main:

The original YouTube version of this video was removed by the site, that story is here

To HRH Prince Charles,

We are writing to you today from Montreal with one simple request. As someone who has demonstrated his love for the preservation of history, we are asking for your majesty’s assistance in saving the historic Red Light District on Montreal’s Main from destruction when you visit us on Tuesday.

St-Laurent Boulevard, commonly known as the Main, was the first street to leave the fortifications of what was then the city of Montreal. Over the next few centuries, it welcomed immigrants from all over the world to become the thriving multicultural hub that it is today.  It has even been declared a national heritage site.

Behind its historic facade, numerous independent artists including burlesque dancers, fetish performers and others call the vaudeville thrust stage of the legendary Café Cleopatre home and have done so for several years.

The lower Main, the gateway to the old port is living history and a vibrant artistic community, but it is under threat. A developer wants to evict the artists and residents, demolish the buildings and replace them with a twelve-story office tower under the guise of a Quartier des spectacles (entertainment district).

Despite objections from historians, academics, residents and artists and a ruling against the project from the Montreal public consultation office, the developer and the city plan to go ahead with the project, dubbed the Quadrilatere St-Laurent.

With nowhere else to turn, we are requesting that your majesty bring the issue up with Mayor Gerald Tremblay and any other officials you may encounter on your trip to Montreal or at very least make a public statement in support of the artists and residents and in support of our history.

UPDATE: VIDEO REMOVED FROM YOUTUBE

Our video was removed from YouTube for “sexually inappropriate content.”  Really?  I mean, really?  We’re talking about the same video that’s in this post.

UPDATE: TRYING TO MEET THE PRINCE

Tuesday night, the riot squad prevented us from delivering our message to Prince Charles in person:

Velma and riot cops

Velma Candyass of the Dead Dolls and riot cops (photo by Domenic Castelli)

You can read media reports of what happened here:

“Prince Chuck misses out on lapdance” by Jamie O’ Meara, Up to the Hour (Hour Magazine)

“Royal welcome” photo by Kate Hutchinson, Montreal Mirror

“Montréal : Å“ufs, tomates et strip-tease pour le Prince Charles” par Yannick Vely, Paris Match

“If the mayor won’t listen, maybe the prince will” by Jason C. McLean, Forget The Box

“please, charlie boy, save montreal’s red-light district” by Andy Riga, Montreal Gazette

“Une foule bigarrée accueille le prince” par Judith Lachapelle, La Presse

We never got to deliver our message to the Prince Charles in person and still haven’t received a response to our letter or video.  He’s in Ottawa until tomorrow.  Hopefully he’ll hear our message before returning to England.

** If you want to help spread the word, please forward, re-post, Facebook, Digg, etc. this post and/or this video to all your friends and lists, especially to people in England.

****You can also contact Prince Charles through his Regeneration Trust:

info@princes-regeneration.org

Reclaim the Main challenge

October 13th, 2009

In case you haven’t noticed, this is election season in Montreal.  This year’s campaign has been quite a raucous one.  There has been plenty of talk about water meters, mayoral candidates’ ability to speak English and new transportation strategies.  One issue that seems to have been pushed to the background, though, is the protection of the Main.

St-Laurent Boulevard, the first street to make it’s way out of the fortified city which is now called Old Montreal was designated as a national heritage site by Parks Canada.  In keeping with this status “intrusive elements must be kept to a minimal.”

Anyone who’s been to the Main lately will notice that this is anything but the case.  From the giant scaffolding wrap billboard mounted last summer by an allegedly dubious promoter, to the billboard trucks that drive up the street all summer long, to the heavy corporate presence at street sales that are supposed to be for local merchants but instead are policed for the benefit of NewAd Media, to attempts by a developer to replace historic performance venues with a giant eyesore office tower, the Main is under threat.

Since Parks Canada has given the city of Montreal the job of protecting the Main, the Reclaim the Main campaign wants to know what politicians are going to do about it if elected or re-elected November 1st.  So, we are proud to present the first ever Reclaim the Main challenge! The rules are simple – mayoral candidates or their appointed representatives are asked to answer this one question:

What will you do to preserve the Main’s historic status, promote the interests of those who live and work there and protect against corporate intrusions?

One response per party. English, French or bilingual. Independents are also welcome to respond. Answers should mention their plan to deal with billboard trucks, unscrupulous advertisers and developers and how to combat corporate and private dominance of public space at street fairs.  They should be sent to main@optative.net and will be published here before the election.

The winner gets the endorsement of the Reclaim the Main campaign and OTL and will be featured in this space. Plus, they’ll be doing the right thing for the Main and for Montreal.  Ordinary citizens are also invited to address this issue and send their responses to the same address or just post them in the comments below – see how you compare to the politicians!

Infiltrators needed: agents in town on Saturday, November 7th

September 25th, 2009

OTL has learned that agents of the Department of Homeland Insecurity along with the FBI will be in Montreal on Saturday, November 7th to track illegal aliens.  They need to be stopped and the aliens need to be protected at all costs.  You can help us by infiltrating the bureau.

In a secret communiqué obtained by OTL, the bureau is recruiting locals and offering a pay-what-you-can training session to give you the tools to help them track and apprehend aliens like this one:

buf1

We feel that this is a blatant attempt at discrimination and scapegoating.  After all, these supposed aliens aren’t evil.  They aren’t harming anyone.  They’re just trying to get by and aren’t even a drain.  They eat the food that the rest of us throw away or don’t even consider to be food in the first place as this photo suggests:

buf2jpg

If you want to help us, here’s the plan.  Sign up for the bureau’s “training sessions” by phoning 514-699-3378.  You’ll need to have the password, which we have learned is “sparrowdove.”  These sessions are for three people at a time and leaving every 30 minutes or so between 3pm and 8pm on Saturday, November 7th, so you’ll need to reserve a spot in advance.

Then, at the appropriate time, go to the bureau’s Montreal headquarters which, due to budget cuts, are located inside Bar Bifteck, 3702 St-Laurent and look for this man:

buf5

Tell him you want to help, but always remember your mission.  You may get some help along the way from other more high-placed infiltrators in the bureau.  It’s a tough job, but please remember why you’re doing it, so the “aliens” can live free.

We’re counting on you, but more importantly, they’re counting on you

——————————–

Car Stories: Alien Invasion continues a tradition that has been described as “the most fun you might ever have in the backseat of a car” (Ottawa Citizen).  Three spect-actors at a time are invited to witness and take part in Montreal’s longest-running theatrical experiment by going on a guided theatrical joyride through the Urban Wonderland and its alleyways, cars and parking lots.

The 2009 edition won six Iffy awards at this year’s Buffalo infringement Festival where it premiered and now returns to Montreal for one day only.  Please call 514-699-3378 or e-mail carstories@optative.net to see the show or check out our site for more info.

If you saw us in June at the 2009 Montreal infringement Festival, this is a completely different show but it is still PAY-WHAT-YOU-CAN at the end, so hop in and enjoy the ride!

*** Please FWD widely and re-post